My Birthday Reflection on Growth with ADHD
Today is my birthday. And honestly, most birthdays once used to have a tinge of bitterness for me. There was always this undertone of sadness underlying the celebrations, because my mom isn't with me anymore.
Not being able to celebrate this day with her, not getting to hear her voice or catch her hug, left an aching gap which felt hard to fill.
A photo of my beautiful Momma, Dorothy W. Jones, on the right and my, her twin, Netta on the left. This is one of my favorite photos that I will always cherish♥️♥️♥️
But somewhere along the way, I've grown to accept that grief and temper it into something different—into joy, into gratitude, into living my life in her honor.
And today, I am complete. I am at peace. I am at ease. I am ready—with open arms—to welcome whatever God has in store for me.
Reflecting on 42: A Year of Miracles
Looking back over this past year of my life—age 42—I can see how far I've come.
I have accomplished more in one year than I ever could have imagined, and honestly, more than many get to accomplish in a whole lifetime. And I don't say this triumphantly—I say it gratefully.
New Callings and Creative Courage
I began a new profession (my 4th and final career) as a birth and postpartum doula, stepping in intentionally and working with families through some of their most sacred moments.
I launched two publications on Substack, Vent to Victory, where I turn vents of day-to-day life as an ADHDer, mom, wife, and Black woman in America into a victory. The main publication is ADHDventures in Homeschooling, where I talk about the life of homeschooling as a mommy with ADHD, the goods, the chaos, and gratitude.
I began a blog, a podcast (Chatterbrain Mommy), and an e-book that is deeply personal and emotional to my journey.
Connections That Became Chosen Family
With all that, I've encountered some of the sweetest souls—those who've not only advised me but who now are friends, sisters, and chosen family.
They've invested in me just as I've learned to invest in others.
The Radical Shift: Choosing Myself First
But perhaps the most revolutionary of this journey? I've learned to put myself first.
As someone with ADHD, that hasn't always been intuitive. We get pulled in by the hustle, by the whirl of overthinking and overstimulation, constantly chasing after the next thing or trying to "catch up."
But this year, I took my foot off the gas.
I learned to sleep without guilt.
I embraced quiet.
I re-established my spirituality, deepening my connection with God in a way that keeps me centered no matter what's going on around me.
I began to turn about the old habits and replacing them with intentional routines. I found joy within myself. I stopped waiting for peace and instead learned how to create it.
A photo of me as I embrace the beautiful bloom of many flowers, meaning many opportunities arise as I walk in my purpose.
A photo of me as I am so joyful. These flowers were given to me by my baby daughter on my 21st anniversary on 4/13/2025.
Walking Boldly in My Purpose
That's why I'm still strutting my stuff confidently in my ministry as an ADHD life and wellness coach. In spite of the bumps, in spite of the doubt, I know this is what I am called to do.
My coaching website will be live in a few weeks, and I'm already taking pre-appointments.
I've had single-session work that has reminded me how desperately this work is needed—and I'm just so blessed to be creating a successful business where I can come fully, not only for my clients, but for my family as well.
Welcoming 43: A Year for Blooming
This year, 43 is going to be about growth and establishment. Last year was establishing—putting the foundation down. This year is about watering the seeds that I planted last year and watching them bloom.
So stay tuned. God’s not done. I’m walking in my purpose, with love in my heart, and fire in my spirit—and I’m ready to help others do the same.
How to Help Your Homeschool Child Get Organized (When You’re Brain is Unorganized)
The term "organized chaos" isn't just a catchphrase if you're anything like me; it's a way of life. I frequently feel like I'm barely surviving as a mom with ADHD who homeschools. Nevertheless, here I am, attempting to teach my children the same skill that I find most difficult: organizing.
I recognize the irony. The good news is that you don't need to be a naturally organized person to help your children learn how to be organized. Teaching them can actually be a learning experience for both of you. Even if you've never used a planner before, you can still come up with a method that works if you have a little humor, patience, and ingenuity.
Learning Alongside My Kids
I’ll be honest: when I first tried to get my child to organize his homeschool work, it was an absolute disaster. Papers everywhere, lost pencils, and forgotten assignments. I tried color-coded folders, elaborate schedules, and even bought a fancy planner, but within days, it all fell apart.
That’s when I realized I was approaching it the wrong way. Instead of trying to teach a system that I wasn’t even good at, I needed to make it a team effort. So, I reframed my approach:
💡 Instead of "Let me teach you how to be organized," I switched to "Let’s learn this together."
That one change made a world of difference.
1. Start Small & Keep It Simple
Burnout is inevitable if you attempt to change your homeschooling system all at once (for you and your child). Rather, begin with tiny, doable measures.
✅ Choose one thing at a time—maybe organizing their daily assignments or setting up a routine for putting supplies away.
✅ Set a timer for five minutes at the end of the day to do a quick tidy-up of the homeschool area.
What is working for us: We started with a "Clean Desk Challenge." At the end of school or when I want my 6-year-old to clean his toys, we set a timer and spend five minutes organizing our workspace. No pressure, no stress—just a quick reset. Small steps, big impact.
2. Make It Visual (Because ADHD Brains Need It!)
I cannot rely on memory alone to keep us on track. So, I turned to visual supports—the lifeline of every ADHD household.
📌 Charts, color-coded labels, and sticky notes are our best friends.
📖 What worked for us: We created a homeschool binder where my child can see everything at a glance. Inside, we have:
A checklist of subjects for the day
A simple, flexible "unscheduled schedule"
A place to store completed work so nothing gets lost
My son loves checking things off. It gives him a sense of accomplishment, and I love that it keeps him on track without me nagging.
3. Make It a Game (Because Fun = Engagement)
Let’s be real—if it’s not fun, ADHD brains check out. So, we turned organizing into a game.
🎯 How we do it:
We play a game called "Speedy Clean"—where we race against a timer to see who can finish their task first.
My job: Organizing the papers and books
His job: Sorting crayons, markers, and supplies into their proper spots
Guess who wins every time? Hint: It’s not me. 😂
🏆 Bonus Tip: Add rewards! Stickers, small treats, or extra screen time work wonders for motivation.
4. Lead by Example (Even If You Struggle)
This part is hard because—let’s be honest—if I were naturally organized, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. But the truth is, kids learn from what they see, not just what we say.
What worked for us: I started doing one small, visible habit every day—making my bed.
One morning, my son saw me doing it and proudly announced: "I’m going to make my bed too, Mommy!" It wasn’t perfect, but he tried, and that’s what matters.
Moral of the story: Your kids don’t need you to be perfect. They just need to see you trying.
5. Celebrate Progress (Not Perfection)
Organization isn’t about doing things perfectly every time—it’s about building habits.
🙌 How we celebrate: We have "Organization Fridays." Every Friday, we:
Do a quick reset of our homeschool area
Reflect on what worked that week
Treat ourselves to something fun (a movie, game night, or a treat)
These little victories keep us motivated and remind us that progress is more important than perfection.
Final Thoughts: Growing Together
Helping your homeschooled child get organized when you feel entirely unorganized yourself can feel impossible. But the truth is, it’s one of the most humbling and rewarding things you can do.
💡 You don’t have to be a master of organization to teach it. You just have to be willing to learn alongside your child.
💡 The goal isn’t perfection—it’s progress. And along the way, you’re teaching them not just how to arrange their schoolwork, but how to be resilient, adaptable, and problem-solving thinkers.
That’s a win for both of you.
Ready to build systems that work for you and your child? Download my guide, Homeschooling Like a Pro (Even With ADHD!), for more practical tips and strategies to thrive in homeschooling and beyond.
ADHD Isn’t Just About Focus—It’s a Whole Different Way of Experiencing Life!
Main image by Ehimetalor Akhere Unuabona
ADHD isn't just an issue of being hyper or having a problem focusing—it's about experiencing the world in an entirely different manner.
If you've got ADHD (or think you do), you already know it's not about forgetting your keys for the dozenth time or zoning out in the middle of a discussion.
It's the rollercoaster of hyperfocus one day and utter forgetfulness the next.
It's the struggle of time management, thought organization, and even relationship management.
Some days, you're unstoppable. On other days, you can't remember why you opened the fridge.
Ring a bell?
This vivid image captures a bustling city that never truly stops, where everyday life's vibrant hustle and bustle plays out like a never-ending show. The constant motion and clamor reflect the delightful yet chaotic whirlwind that characterizes the overactive mind of someone with ADHD. It's a beautiful mess, brimming with energy and excitement, yet it often overwhelms one in the vibrant maze.
What Causes ADHD?
ADHD isn’t just about “not trying hard enough” or “being lazy.” It’s a legit brain difference, and science backs it up.
Genetics Play a Big Role
If your parents or siblings have ADHD, there’s a good chance you do too. Studies show that it runs in families.
Brain Chemistry & Structure
Image of the brain lighting up with thoughts and different processes
Focus, motivation, and impulse control are all impacted by the variations in dopamine levels in the brains of people with ADHD. The "control center" of the brain, which is responsible for executive function, doesn't always function the same way in neurotypical brains.
Environmental Factors
Prenatal exposure to drugs, alcohol, or nicotine may increase the chance of ADHD.
Prenatal exposure to drugs, alcohol, or nicotine may elevate the risk of ADHD. Low birth weight and premature birth are linked to a higher likelihood of ADHD.
Some research suggests that early exposure to lead and other chemicals may also play a role.
Low birth weight and premature birth are associated with an increased risk of ADHD.
According to some research, early exposure to lead and other chemicals may also be involved.
ADHD Symptoms: The Three Big Categories
ADHD symptoms are usually grouped into three major categories: inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. You might lean heavily toward one or experience a mix of all three. Here’s what that looks like in real life:
Inattention Symptoms (aka The Scatterbrain Struggles)
You start a task with full enthusiasm, only to abandon it five minutes later because something else caught your eye.
Your workspace looks like a hurricane hit it—papers, coffee cups, and random objects everywhere.
You lose your phone, keys, or wallet at least twice a day. (And they’re always in some weird place, like the fridge.)
You space out in conversations, even when you’re genuinely interested.
You leave projects until the last minute, even though you know it’ll stress you out later.
Keeping a planner sounds like a great idea, but actually using it consistently? Not happening.
Hyperactivity Symptoms (aka The Human Energy Drink)
You tap your foot, click your pen, or bounce your leg constantly—sitting still feels like torture.
You interrupt people mid-sentence, not because you’re rude, but because your brain moves a mile a minute.
You get up and pace while thinking, watching TV, or even talking on the phone.
You talk a lot. Like, a lot. And sometimes realize you’ve been rambling for five minutes straight.
Sitting through a long meeting or lecture? Absolute nightmare.
Impulsivity Symptoms (aka Oops, Did I Just Say That?)
You say things without thinking, which can occasionally result in awkward circumstances.
You make spontaneous decisions without taking into account the advantages and disadvantages; sometimes they turn out well, and other times they go wrong.
You find it difficult to wait your turn in traffic, lines, or conversations. Very impatient because you feel like you are in a rush.
Purchases on impulse are your worst enemy when it comes to online buying, therefore it might be risky.
ADHD Ain’t a Weakness—It’s Just a Different Operating System
Having ADHD doesn’t mean you’re lazy, unmotivated, or incapable.
It just means your brain works differently, and you need to find strategies that fit your style.
Some of the most creative, successful, and innovative people in history had ADHD.
The key is learning how to work with your brain, not against it. Whether it’s medication, therapy, lifestyle changes, or a mix of everything, you can build a system that helps you thrive.
ADHD isn’t a roadblock—it’s just a different way of navigating the world.
Managing ADHD isn’t about "fixing" yourself—it’s about finding the right tools to work with your brain, not against it.
That’s why I created an ADHD Planner to help you stay on track without overwhelm.
You can grab yours now here and start organizing life on your terms!
Click here to check it out!
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